} all i can give

im sorry. i cant do anything. i cant help. let them do the good job. im just standing by. all i can give you is. my support. i will support you even though i may not show it. i dont have anything else to give. im so sorry. i try but..i keep screwing up. maybe its just ingrained within me or something. i just wasnt born to be someone. my attitude sucks too much. im sure you can tell. i dont know what to do. im lost now. pls leave me alone.

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:) i did one maths paper today. hahaha. of course i left practically half of it blank. but i tried. wahaha.

yest night i had a dream that was cut up into many parts. weird. in one part. i was in a room..with a lot of lifts. they were all labeled '3-0', '3-1',... etc. i dunno why. so i went to the first one. the lift went down to a basement. when the doors opened. i saw...myself. err. when i stepped out. that other 'me' attacked me. so after fighting playstation-style for a long time, i killed 'myself'. then the dream switched to another part. i cant remember all the parts of the dream..but in some parts, im always in a dim room, full of a lot of people, but somehow i felt so alone. i dunno what it all means.

this is the first time in donkey years that i can remember my dreams. now i think i'd rather not. :S

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i dont see the point.

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the scientist - coldplay

come up to meet you
tell you im sorry
you dont know how lovely you are.

i had to find you
tell you i need you
tell you i set you apart.

tell me your secrets
and ask me your questions
oh lets go back to the start.

runnin in circles
comin up tails
its only science apart.

nobody said it was easy
its such a shame for us to part
nobody said it was easy
no one ever said it would be this hard
oh take me back to the start.

i was just guessing
at numbers and figures
pulling the puzzles apart.

questions of science
science and progress
do not speak as loud as my heart.

tell me you love me
come back and haunt me
oh when i rush to the start.

runnin in circles
chasin tails
comin back as we are.

nobody said it was easy
its such a shame for us to part
nobody said it was easy
no one ever said it would be so hard
im goin back to the start.

2005-04-20, 9:10 p.m..
before } after