} way back into love

At some point, you've just got to back yourself. This is something I remember reading from a Masterchef Australia contestant, and has been coming to mind today.

I have to believe in myself first, because on the days when I have no positive affirmation the only person I can turn to is myself.

In Mongolia, when I lost all confidence -- I needed to back myself then, trust that I made the decision to join the trip for a reason.

With each piece of work I do and each decision I make at work -- I need to back myself and know that I am capable. I may be struggling, but I am capable. And even if someone differs in opinion, that may be just it - a difference of opinion - or, at the most, an opportunity to grow and learn. It does not speak of failure or incompetence.

But I always judge others harshly, so I judge myself harshly as well.

This quiet confidence and self-assurance can only come from an honest assessment of my knowledge and abilities, not talking up or down. Also - be kind to yourself, trust that you are not a bad person, not a lazy person, not an unmotivated person, not a fearful person. Feelings that come and go -- even if they seem overwhelming or seem to remain for a long time - do not define you.

I need to find a way to believe in myself again.

2019-08-19, 8:39 p.m..
before } after