} just thoughts

blogging because i just saw a note posted by a schoolmate (friend? acquaintance?) on Facebook. It was a letter addressed to his late father, who passed away while he was at his hostel orientation in year 1... he had missed his calls from home and was therefore a few hours late to see his dad's last moments. i cannot even begin to grasp how painful that would feel. for me, at least, a father is just the person who is always there. to have that snatched away is, well.

it was in an entirely different context, but while we were in Vienna El commented that i must have grown up assuming that everyone is Straight. i never figured out whether that was meant as just an innocent comment or even a jibe, slightly spiteful, but i had decided to brush it aside. but i guess it's true, because before i begin to get to know someone, i imagine him or her in the Sims-like default setting of being in a standard nuclear family, two parents and siblings, middle class, of normal temperament, of normal sanity level -- basically, no quirks whatsoever.

which is why it constantly amazes me when i get a glimpse beyond the surface, when i get to learn bits and pieces of a person's pains and peeves and dreams and passions. what makes them who they are and why they do what they do and why they acted the way they did.

other people are always, always infinitely more interesting than myself and i am glad to be reminded of that. i also need to remember to scratch beyond the surface.

...at the same time, i really don't know what to do about this Facebook thing. i'm starting to feel quite uncomfortable being able to know so much about someone without being close to them, without even talking to them for the last few months. and something as personal as the death of a parent...... and i'm feeling uncomfortable that i am getting used to/addicted to all the new knowledge. T_T

looks like time for Facebook rehab again...

2012-08-03, 1:34 a.m..
before } after


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