} waa

it's been a strange week. a lot of emo-ness i think. followed by the usual feeling of feeling stupid. and then now, in retrospect, the feeling that maybe sometimes i am too harsh on myself. but also little pockets of wonderful feelings, like seeing the little gallery at the Mandarin Gallery (this sentence sounds awfully stupid so far, and i like the word awfully) which came with my enlightenment. is that self-discovery? the moment of imagining something and realising, yes. this is what I would love to do. this is what I would love to bitch about when I am tired of it. but this is what I would be proud to talk about when I'm not.

i could split this December holiday into chapters, it really felt like that. like the Dazed Days - the first week into the holidays when I just spent so much time sleeping, that I was walking around perpetually half-asleep. (i still think that is THE perfect holiday mood.) the Gloria chapter? haha. first with Novita, then with Suhui, then with Denise. i duno why we couldn't all meet at once. and then The Wedding, followed by the Bali Chapter. and then Denise's Resubmission. and so on.

yesterday at 6pm when i had my last 3D encounter with suhui closed off another chapter. its very hard to enjoy something, when you know its going to be the last time in a long time. one good thing i learned last year was to enjoy the moment without thinking too much about the next time, tomorrow, ten minutes from now. but goodbyes are hard. like 2008. or like when a good TV show ends. but I think what others are learning is that goodbyes are only as lasting as you make them. i need to learn that too. this year should be a year of action. i hope my horoscope is true (I read it in I-S magazine though, should not be too hopeful).

2010-01-10, 3:14 p.m..
before } after


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