} too short

after lunch i like to go downstairs to the building's lobby and get a breath of fresh air before returning to the suffocating office. today the security guard, who is a really nice man and says hi every time he sees me, said hi as usual.

he asked me if ive eaten (in chinese, but i figured it out heh), i said yes. i asked him how he is. he said fine. he asked me how i am. i said ok... just tired of work.

he said i dont look too happy working here. i said, no not really. i will probably quit soon. at that point, something ive been considering for weeks became a solid resolution. he smiled and said, life is too short not to be happy. if you are not happy, its time to 'zhao' (pls forgive if spelling is wrong).

i think my work experience at max brenner's taught me to be more open, that its ok to step out of my comfort zone. and then, my work experience here taught me that, contrary to what i thought previously, not everything will work out, and when it doesnt, i have to know when to quit.

now seems like a good time.

not to say that my experience has been entirely negative. for one thing, even though i like design in general, i kind of learnt more about my tastes...my style preference maybe? (clean, fuss-free, good colour combo, witty) and i have met nice people.. its just that it seems impossible to actually be friends with them because i cant seem to hold a conversation with them that is longer than 5 lines...

unfortunately, all this doesnt help at all with the decision that i have to make by tonight. after looking at both syllabuses quite closely, i have come to the conclusion that i want to study both. =/ i guess that makes me a real nerd, hahah.. i really cant tell if law is something im genuinely into, or just a fleeting interest. i feel like im choosing someone to marry and i have to figure out which one is just an affair and which one is a lasting love. i can relate to schezn's dream now...

2008-05-26, 1:54 p.m..
before } after