} eleanor rigby

my head is in a crazy state. i keep see-sawing back and forth from opposite frames of mind: hopeful then hopeless, optimistic then pessimistic, happy then upset, loved then lonely, daring then fearful. its quite exhausting, changing my mind so much in such a short time. maybe thats why im blogging so (read: TOO) often now, at least it makes my thoughts stay still for a few mins.

right now i am at the negative side of all those emotions i described. poo.

and, forgive me for being slow, but i just learnt the format of the SMU interview. my thoughts on it are: What. The. Shit. hahaha. now im quite convinced that i wont make it, though i guess it doesnt really matter since im only applying cos my parents want me to! bahhhh! =(

maybe its just a bad week. :/ and its only...tuesday...... groan.

i've been feeling so detached & i feel like its been a long time since i really enjoyed myself doing something. even playing the guitar today felt empty. and inadequate.

and i know im being a prat for feeling alone (the old no-one-else-understands emo thing again, which i thought i grew out of and left behind long ago) but i do feel lonely a lot of the time.

all the lonely people
where do they all come from?
all the lonely people
where do they all belong?

oh Beatles i love you.

(oh and, posting sad song lyrics? - yet another emo thing i thought i left behind. ahh crap.)

2008-04-08, 11:02 p.m..
before } after