} of choices, grumpy bus drivers and being asked for directions

i went to Green House tuition centre this morning to pick up work and drop off some souvenirs from china, haha. and i got more than what i expected. today there was someone else at work other than me, schezn and her mum. i thought it was one of the chinese teachers at first, but then we started talking (not sure how, i think she was just being very nice) and she explained that she was just doing editing work.

anyway, we both started taking a break from our work and just talked. she asked me what i want to study in uni, and then we started talking about careers and stuff. i found out that she used to teach in a secondary school in china. she also told me she had been a lawyer before, although she studied engineering in uni. she said being a lawyer is tough, and the pay was low, but the work is meaningful. something that assured me and worried me at the same time (since i always associated lawyers with high pay).

then i asked her if she had ever been an engineer, and she said that she has been a lot of things before: engineer, project manager, lawyer, teacher... which kind of surprised me. but she said that for the first years at work its ok to try and experiment. one of the most comforting things i've heard about this topic. its just that you miss out on the opportunity to rise up in a company, get higher pay and stuff. but that way maybe its easier to be down-to-earth, not so easily sucked into the rat race and all. and i dont really mind not being rich & successful, really. just want to do something that means something.

anyway, together with what schezn said, and ironically, what i said (one of those moments when i realise i had some answers inside me all along), i think im pretty much decided. or undecided. i duno how to say it, but i guess i've come to terms with my indecision. what i've just decided, is that i've spent too long worrying if im doing the right thing, making the right decision. now i'd like to believe in the story of The Alchemist, where a person is led towards his destiny no matter how many wrong turns he makes along the way. so at this juncture, maybe i'll make the right choice and maybe i wont. take a chance, take a leap of faith, make mistakes..if necessary. in Westlife's (or their songwriter's) words: A life without taking chances; is no kind of life at all; You've got to stand up for something; even if you might fall.

i like to believe that, as long as i try to do the right thing, i'll end up somewhere on the right path in the end.

so, yeah. it doesnt mean that it will be any easier from now on, all these choices all of us have to make, but i know i will breathe more easily from now.

...

anyway. haha. must also write about my encounter with the Grumpy Bus Driver. haha. from the tuition centre i went to salvation army. schezn told me i could take 410, but when 54 came along i decided to check if it went there too... so i flagged the bus, and asked the bus driver, who looked extremely Grumpy. our conversation went something like:

me: 'does this bus go to Salvation Army?'
GBD: 'yes yes'
me: 'do you know how many stops?'
GBD: (gruffly) 'i don' no' (looks away)

so i boarded the bus, with some misgivings about the driver, but i decided to just keep a lookout for the building. 1st bus stop. ok, not the one. 2nd bus stop...no sign of it. several people boarded the bus. GBD got up from his seat, looked around. i wondered who had annoyed him this time.

'Salvation Army?'

i literally went o.o then said '..yea?' and he said, 'here, here' and pointed to the bus stop. and i just stupidly went 'oh, its here?' and i got down. as i walked down the steps i just remembered to say out a quick 'THANKYOU' to the driver. i still didnt have any idea where the SA was though, cos i couldnt see it from the bus stop, but i was too scared to ask the GBD and annoy him again, haha, so i just tried looking around.

and then the driver honked at me, and pointed straight ahead. i went o.o again, and then i caught myself and waved to acknowledge him and burst into this big corny smile. couldnt help it, haha. i wanted to laugh, actually, which i did...after he drove away.

maybe it was because he thought i was a nice person cos i was going to the Salvation Army (HAHA), but that driver with his grumpy exterior turned out to be surprisingly helpful... more helpful than any other bus drivers i've encountered, actually.

at first i wondered why i was meeting so many nice strangers today, and just now i realised that it might be because its V-DAY. hahahahaha. i might believe in st valentine after all.

but those nice people should put me to shame, really, cos 2 people asked me for directions and i think i led them both astray. the first one asked for Tanglin Shopping Centre, but i thought she meant Tanglin Mall... later on i realised my mistake. (uhhh.) the second one asked which bus to take to Bedok Central, and i said 'i dunno' cos i genuinely dont know, but looking back i could have done more. it was an old grandma and a foreign maid, so i waited at the bus stop, 'saw them off', so to speak.. but i did see the bus driver mouthing that the bus did not go to bedok central, although it goes to bedok. i could have suggested taking the train, or something. my silence could have gotten them lost.

after all, i should have learnt my lesson from the grumpy bus driver.. that there's a lot more i can do than saying 'i dont know'.

...

2008-02-14, 9:26 p.m..
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