} woooooooo

so after 3 days of delirious...ness, finally woke up mentally haha so its time to get down to work!! nvm the fact that its already past 9pm now which means i have effectively wasted almost the entire day already... ok not entirely wasted cos come to think about it 8-9 hours of it was spent sleeping, followed by an hour watching tv (it was a good show so it was worth it), then went to the australia uni edufair for almost 4 hours (which was quite useful btw, thanks to janice who told me abt it, found a few good uni and very friendly people! unfortunately no free food) ... and the rest was spent playing neopets. which is an important destressing activity.

ok well but seriously i guess i really have to buck up. i havent been checking km regularly so i didnt sign up for the maths mock paper... which is bad, i think, cos i think i need the practice. oh no. :( well nvm, i will make up for it by finishing EVERY MATHS WORKSHEET/TUTORIAL/ETC EVER GIVEN TO US. this is in my green effort because i decided that since so many trees died in the process of making these papers, i should at least do the papers so their deaths can have meaning somewhat. (i.e., in improving my a level grades...hopefully.) im quite determined with this. i think the thing with studying is that i must keep all my goals totally crazy and impossible, cos that seems to make it more exciting (??) /challenging to do. or maybe it will make me give up entirely. i duno yet cos this is a new strategy. but anyway.

im starting to feel nervous.. but in a good way, i think. in a 'ok i just really have to put my all into this' kind of way. im just really scared of... econs, and my h3 paper. ahh h3. with our messed up notes and noncommitted teacher i/c *cough*MRWEE*cough* and our prelim paper not even fully gone through. still, i guess i cant blame others when its possible for other people in class to get more than a Pass.

2 weeks away...! thats all we have, to finish up this one last test, to prove that 12 years (more if you count kindergarten) of schooling hasnt gone to waste. it is really, the CULMINATION of everything. sounds micro, to make a level sound so central, but it really is the end point of these school uniformed days. and as much as i acknowledge that a level is but a small part of life, i want this end point to be good.

i duno how im doing it but i keep linking the oxford interview to gp. like a word association thing. maybe cos both are very english and i missed gp class to go for that interview. and with haunting memories of the interview playing over in my mind and the word oxford popping up everywhere (DAMN dictionaries) i tend to worry about gp a lot. i just. i dont want to screw up again. =|

haha ok ok cant be emo at this time. (must be cos of the sad oscar wilde stories i've been reading.) did i mention that i havent been able to shit since i fell sick? thats hmm 3 days ago mmmmm. but i've been sweating more than usual lately. maybe im sweating out all my waste products, since i've been drinking so much water. -_-

ok off to mark my a level calendar now. SO FUN, WHEEEEEEEE 8)

2007-10-14, 9:06 p.m..
before } after