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went to the national library today, to read up on one chapter of organic chem since i lost that set of notes... it feels nice to sit in the reference library with thick textbooks and a notepad, makes me feel all smart and intellectual. haha. while studying novita called & smsed about chem questions, it felt good that i could still remember the explanation for her questions. =) (i hope it will come out for prelims, ha ha.)

and its quite fun guessing what people are like or what they do by the books that they're reading. eg., there were these two guys with laptops, and their books all had either 'podcast' or 'webcast' in their titles... so they could be doing their own online radio show, for a project or something. and the woman sitting opposite me kept bringing me STACKS and STACKS of baby names books, so she might be pregnant (and extremely excited) or she might be some kind of writer in need of names... and the woman sitting next to me had a book called 'Managing Your Anger', so i ... decided not to look at her too much. =| (but later on the Anger woman talked to me a bit, actually she looks very nice, but looks can be deceiving.. and when she asked me to help look after the books i decided not to refuse although i was actually going to leave)

and after i was done with the book, i wanted to continue studying since i brought other stuff along but all the tables at b1 were occupied. =/ suddenly thought of looking for the ellen degeneres book, and came across this compilation of inspirational stories from all kinds of famous people, and ellen contributed her story there. she wrote about how she admitted that she's gay, how the confession gave her both a sense of liberation and a lot of pain, from other people, cos her open confession destroyed the career and everything she worked for prior to that. and.. i duno, it left me thinking - i guess that kind of book is supposed to leave people thinking - and i guess, you could lie and mask your true self to gain others' acceptance for as long as you like, but ultimately to be really happy and true to yourself you'd have to sacrifice some people's goodwill and acceptance. and that might make it hurt for a while but ultimately the feeling that comes after would balance it out, somehow.

ok i started stoning a bit there so i think i've given up on coherence by now. haha. well..

on a less deep note, upon leaving the library i decided that it felt like a good day and therefore i would be able to find the bus stop to go home. haha. and i did find a bus stop, except that its the esplanade one... damnit! i know there's a bus stop somewhere near the library, i found it before, but i cant for the life of me remember where it was. gahhh.

so since i walked all the way to esplanade already, i decided to go to the library there... unfortunately it was also full, but at least i got to see it for the first time and its pretty cool! really artsy feel, though that can be a bad thing too since it makes me feel even more nerdy than i already am to be mugging there.

haha and just as i was coming out of the esplanade i saw a bus at the bus stop, and a thought came across, like 'haha it would be kind of funny if that was my bus' and, haha funny thing, it really was my bus! so i RAN out and the bus driver stopped cos i guess he saw me and he had this amused smile on his face lol.

anyway live the dream is on, glad i could catch FENDI cos i think he's the only one i like in the entire competition. cos he seems to be the only one who is really cool, not acting cool, and can really sing, not trying to act like he can. like eg., victor tang?? go back to selling ice cream, pls. haha. as for the groups... i think i kind of like catsinecradle, cos they sang Sunday Morning haha. =D though i find the main singer obnoxiously annoying.

ok need to get back to studying, now.

2007-09-05, 9:07 p.m..
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