} ignore this post, i sound crazy

WWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

ok just need to get that HUMONGOMOUS sigh of relief out.

i have been so preoccupied with thoughts about stupid uni and stuff that i havent been able to really breathe properly. haha ok i have lah if not i would be dead by now but i mean, figuratively haha. and i think i've been walking around with a (figurative) dark cloud above my head too, but thats all gone now haha, at least until someone/something ruins my day haha.

but yea i went to lie down at my house fitness corner (fell asleep too, ironically, since its a fitness corner) and really, after just closing my eyes, with the nice breeze and everything, i finally felt like i can focus for the first time in gah i duno how long.

and yea so i made my decisions blablablah and everything is so much clearer in my head now and i feel like i have a few loads taken off my back.

most of it comes from suddenly remembering this quote:

In the word you will have trouble, but take courage, I have conquered the world. - John 16:33

and you know when you're worried about something the best words of reassurance you'd ever wana hear is like, 'its ok, dont worry, i've got it all taken care of'. and remembering that quote is like God saying ITS OK I'VE GOT IT ALL TAKEN CARE OF SO STOP THINKING ABOUT IT SO MUCH AND GET BACK TO STUDYING SO YOU DONT FAIL YOUR PRELIMS, FOR GOODNESS SAKE!

so, yeah.

i think i can finally really start studying now. its stressful too, of course, but its also quite EXCITING, because its finally, finally, the CULMINATION of everything, all the knowledge that you've ever AMASSED in your life all tested in this one big exam called A LEVELS. it feels like a challenge, really, and i think im going crazy cos i am excited.

and my mum got a JOB, which she wanted, so thats another happy thing too. and it also means i can ask for a bit more allowance so YES NO MORE BREAD FOR LUNCH!!! ...well next month onwards anyway.

and yea most of this entry is just a lot of rambling and im not sure what im writing either hahaha but i guess im just madly relieved and happy at the moment hahaha ok i sound mad.

KAAAAAAAAAA! =)

2007-08-15, 3:28 p.m..
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